Fears and Tears

Nine years ago, I traveled half way around the world to a small village in Bosnia. It was a difficult place to get to and took many plane rides and finally a four hour bus ride before we arrived at our destination about 48 hours later. I had an inner calling to visit this far off place many years earlier. It is the site of an unapproved Church apparition where it is said that the Mother of God is appearing and it was the 30th anniversary of the start of this event.

I couldn’t explain it, but I knew I had to go. Although it was a country that was ravaged by a terrible war in the 90’s, I saw no evidence of this on my visit. It was a peaceful, beautiful village surrounded by mountains. It was as if you could feel the prayers being lifted up with all the Masses said throughout the day along with all the rosaries prayed and all the confessions being heard. I had trouble sleeping while I was there because there was a sense of a great energy in the air.

St. James church is situated in the middle of the village with a large outdoor chapel area for all the pilgrims. It was a visual of how to order one’s life, to show what is important, to keep God in the center of your life, to put Him first.

I really got a sense of this from the view at the top of Cross Mountain. The church was in the middle of the village and it was a breathtaking sight to take in from the high vantage point.

When the apparitions began, it was reported that words would manifest through clouds in the sky. One such report told of the words “Mir, Mir, Mir,” which translates to “Peace, Peace, Peace.” The messages of Medjugorje are simple: Prayer, Fasting, Daily Scripture, Confession and Mass.

I was intrigued by the wooden rosaries that seemed to be everywhere- in the gift shops, hanging from rear-view mirrors of the taxis and I desired to have one. But it would seem every time I would try to purchase one, my group would be moving on to the next location and the rosary was not meant to be.

One of the days, was spent visiting the home of one of the visionaries, and we were told a story of the villagers finding wooden rosaries in the fields. These particular rosaries were kept in a box that we were shown. I remember how simple and lovely they were. I ended up leaving without getting a rosary, I was disappointed but I left with a renewed and thankful heart for the amazing trip that spoke volumes to my heart.

Three months went by, and I found myself at home. A feeling overtook me, and I was flooded with thoughts to go into my bedroom. I acted on the feelings and found myself in the closet where I keep my jewelry box. I opened it to find a wooded rosary draped inside, with the Croatian words etched in the front – MEDUGORJE, and in the back – MIR, MIR, MIR. I remember picking it up, my hands shaking and tears running down my face, my brain was trying to make sense of what was going on. I picked up the phone and called a friend who was on the same trip and told her what I had just found, through the tears with much joy, I had received a rosary after all.

I keep this special rosary close by, it is a treasure, and in the war it will bring peace, peace, peace,

I want you to know that in this kind of warfare, the battering ram has always been the rosary. Our Lady to St. Dominic