Fears and Tears

This past weekend, we watched Toy Story 4 as a family. I think Pixar/Disney does a good job of getting to the deeper, underlying emotions. Toy Story is one series that seems timeless, where the multiple sequels make sense and the story seems fresh and new all over again.

This time we are introduced to a new character “Forky”. The toys have found a new home with their “kid” Bonnie, who is going off to kindergarten. She experiences all the normal reactions on her first day as she cries and is scared.

The main character Woody, is aware of this and accompanies her to school hidden in her backpack. He wants to be with her incase she needs him, to help her in anyway he can. I am transported back in time as I enter kindergarten and later first grade at a different school. I remember the pit in my stomach, the fear and ultimately the kindness of my mom walking me to the classroom. Little unforgotten moments that surface somehow hidden away until now.

The first thing the kids do is a craft project and we see Bonnie sitting alone at a table with Woody watching over her. As she gets distracted, another kid throws away her craft materials. Here, Woody valiantly swoops in to rescue the contents from the trash.

Bonnie is content again and begins making her craft. Here we are introduced to Bonnie’s new friend “Forky”, which she makes out of a spork, pipe cleaner, popsicle stick and a rubber band. She writes her name of the bottom of his foot – “Bonnie”, and now Forky belongs to her, he is her toy.

Forky cannot get past being thrown in the trash, and continually fights to get away from Bonnie and throw himself in the trash, where he believes he belongs. He believes the lie that he is not worth anything and he should be thrown away, it becomes his identity, he is trash. That even though he has a name written on him and belongs to someone, he can only see himself as worthless.

Woody being the rescuer that he is, spends a lot of time pulling Forky out of the trash and continually tells him that he is a toy, and more importantly, Bonnie’s toy, that he brings joy to her, that he has worth and meaning.

I find myself, back in time, when I felt like Forky, when I lost sight of who I was, that I believed the lies and was pulled down into the trash. When the grace and love of God had to shine in the darkness and pull me out. To hear that whisper in my heart, you are mine, my name is written on your soul and you are loved. You are my daughter and I chose you before time began. A concept so immense, so as to ponder it over all the years that have passed, and this movie seemed to touch on these feelings and bring them to the surface.

The end of the story comes with Woody being reunited with his flame Bo Peep. They have been separated for the past seven years. She teaches Woody that it is not his job to always be the rescuer and it is ok to let go. That Bonnie will be fine without him.

We see the camera pan to the faces of the other toys, toys we have known throughout the years, toys that have made us laugh and cry, toys that have made us feel something deep down, toys that have shown us what it is like to see children grow up and move on. What it means to stop holding on and to let go. What a beautiful message as I enter into this new Advent season, the first week which is Hope.

Laughter is timeless, Imagination has no age and Dreams are forever. Walt Disney