Fears and Tears

I have now completed week 8 of Magnify 90 and this week’s virtue is prayerfulness. It is a virtue that invites me to pray at all times with my heart fixed on God.

One of the readings from this week speaks about distractions, which I struggle with. The book suggests that this is an attachment to worldly cares and when they come, offer them as a petition to the Lord. It is a place to work on surrendering to the Lord.

I have frequently thought of Martha this week, who was burdened and distracted by much work. She took her eyes off Jesus, and her thoughts brought her to a state of anxiety and worry. Jesus, in His mercy, reveals the truth to her, and invites her to choose the better part, to remain with eyes fixed on Him. This is where the peace can be found.

Later, when her brother Lazarus has died, and Jesus returns to Bethany, it is Martha who proclaims Jesus as the Messiah, the long awaited Christ, and goes to get her sister Mary. What a beautiful transformation from anxiety and worry to boldness and faith.

She is a wonderful model for me to keep a spirit of prayerfulness in my day to day life and choose the better part.

“Constant prayer is a deep assurance within my heart that God is in charge, and I have no need to worry. That’s what it means to pray continually, because prayer is union with God.”Mother Angelica

As I continue on the Lenten journey, I am grateful for the gift of prayer from God. He is calling me to venture deeper into the desert, to the silence where His voice can be heard. I follow where He leads me, and listen.

It is quiet in the desert, and I sit there for a long time, the sun starts to set, and my eyes grow tired and start to close. I rest in His presence and the Lord speaks to me. I speak to the Lord, and my heart is at peace. I get up and continue on the way, taking in the beauty that surrounds me in the desert.