Fears and Tears

I was at the eye doctor last week for a contact lens fitting. It had been years since I have worn contacts, and I wanted to give it another try. My eyesight has really changed over the years and I require both distance and reading lenses.

The doctor ordered two different options for me to try: two distance lenses, which would require reading glasses when needed or a combined option of one distance contact lens and one reading contact lens. His plan was to try the distance only lenses at first, which seemed fine with me.

His assistant had me put both reading lenses on at the fitting. She had me read the distance chart and I was unable to do so. Everything was blurry and I had double vision. I was really frustrated because everything was blurry, even the huge first letter. She had me sit awhile to let the lenses adjust in my eyes and tried again with the reading charts. The same thing happened, everything was unreadable and I thought that I was unable to go back to contacts. She had me wait for the doctor at that point.

I waited about 15 minutes before the doctor came in. It was really weird sitting there for so long unable to see and I was feeling disappointed and a little anxious. When he came in and examined my eyes, he knew immediately that I had the wrong lenses in. A weight was lifted off me, it wasn’t me that was unable to focus or had put the lenses in wrong, but it was the lenses themselves. He had me switch to the distance lenses and I could read the chart perfectly.

What a concept to apply to one’s life. What lens am I looking through? Is it the truth, a half truth or a falsehood? Can I see clearly what is before me or do I need to change my lens? What volumes it speaks to my heart, to take the time to discern, to reason, to seek out the truth.

This week, on Monday morning I was dealing with some anxiety that was growing and I couldn’t focus. I was having my morning coffee and my mind was weighed down with many thoughts and concerns and it became difficult to calm down. Out my back window, I noticed a beautiful sight, a majestic eagle was circling the back field. He went around a couple of times then hovered by the back window for a couple of seconds, then he soared over the house and flew towards the river. It was amazing to experience and I decided to take a walk to clear my thoughts and get some fresh air. I ended up walking for 45 minutes, enjoying the sun and quiet and the anxiety began to slip away. I was ready to see the day with new eyes and through a clearer lens. I am thankful for the gift of the eagle, reminding me to take the time to see things from a different perspective and new heights where there is hope.

He gives strength to the fainting; for the weak he makes vigor abound. Though young men faint and grow weary, and youths stagger and fall, That they hope in the Lord will renew their strength, and they will soar with eagles’ wings; They will run and not grow weary, walk and not grow faint. Isaiah 40:29-31